Free Believers

Sunday, 18 January 2009

I do like the term free believers, as much as I like any term that has the potential to get the life drained out of it from overuse. But still, that's any term I suppose, isn't it? I like the thought of a bunch of hens picking their way around, away from the machinery and the life of a battery hen. More dangerous out in the wild though. The term free believers reminds me of The Verve's new song, Love is Noise, which I just loverty love. That is a good song for a free believer, seeing it sounds like the backing vocalists are a bunch of electronic chickens :)

Anyway, I love what Darrin Hufford has to say in his latest post. It's cold and hard but it's true. And I suppose I'd rather these days have a cold and broken hallelujah than anything that is illusion, smoke, and mirrors. The first is pain, but it's real. I think I would rather stand on the cold reality (and really, my reality feels very cold to me sometimes) than on anything that looks shiny and will shift under my weight when reality leans on it.

I believe that Christianity has been marketed to the carnal nature of unbelievers. We successfully got people who would not have otherwise become a Christian to sign on the dotted line and join our religion. We did it by presenting "relationship with God" in a way that would appeal to power-hungry money mongers who want to escape the cold reality of life. We told people that God would financially prosper them. We told them that they would never get sick and if they did, God would make it go away. We've promised them that if anyone hurt them, their God would stick up for them and get revenge on their behalf. We convinced them that God would also give them godlike powers and they could dazzle their friends and family with magic tricks. We promised them that God would make sure they held a position of leadership in life where everyone would respect them and pay them honor. I've even seen different ministries claim that Christians have better sex than non-Christians. The list goes on and on. One by one, people signed up for Christianity. People who would not have otherwise given it a second look, found themselves strangely tempted with a religion that promised to fulfill their every carnal desire. The offer was just too good to be true.

Generations later, people are holding onto the promises the sales agent gave them, in spite of the fact that they've never seen the results manifested in their own life. Others finally leave the "faith," drained and disheartened. They didn't get what they wanted from Christianity so they continue searching for a religion that will give it to them. Then we have the people who would have given their heart to God without any marketing at all. It was already in their heart. They came to Him because they wanted Him and nothing else. They would have come without the fancy marketing and boastful claims.

Sadly, these sincere people go through life thinking they are always one step behind the rest of the crowd. They secretly feel like they're doing something wrong and failing God because they get sick and are short on cash and are stuck in a dead-end job at the bottom of the totem pole. They aren't full of intense joy and happiness 24 hours a day like they were told they would be, so they blame themselves for not getting it like they should. They beat themselves up because they truly love God and yet none of the explosions they were told about are happening.

These are the people who will eventually become Free Believers.

I love the way Darrin is calling it as he sees it. I reckon he can call it as he sees it because he has had a vision of God as good, and beautiful. I am ever more drawn towards the people who are latching onto this vision. It's the only thing that saves me :( I'm so bored with hearing God get dissed, to be honest, even while I love the honesty of people doing the dissing. They drag me down to the depths, though - I'm not strong enough to hear the claims at the moment. I need lifting up, not dragging down. I'm already on the floor enough as it is.

Anyway, blah blah blah. I don't have much to say from my own stuff at the moment. The "you are a bitch" gremlins are out in force the last few days. I am taking myself off to Edgars Mission today. Hopefully being out amongst my fellow animals and a couple of people who I trust will soothe my soul a bit today. God knows I need it.


  1. That would be me...well, except for the part about being "got" because I wasn't "got", I was born into it. However, all the rest applies. I was consumed with the "what am I doing wrong" for a long time...I must have unconfessed sin, I must have unforgiveness in my heart, I must be hiding something from God. Blah blah blah. Because I'm not rich, I'm not happy, I'm not healthy...even after everything I've done for God. The whole nine yards...

    Yay it's good to be free!

  2. It's actually a testament to the tenacity of the human spirit that so many people got through that whole deal without killing themselves.

    Seriously, the last couple of years, the only thing that had me hanging on was God, really. I still feel like that a lot. Right now, I just want to bunker down inside my house and never see anyone again and just be with God.

    Oh, yeah, that "after everything I've done for you!" thing ;) That makes me laugh that we do that. As if God is some kind of cosmic hoop jumper. "You prayed every day? Oh, okay, then, I will make your life comfortable." Sheesh. If God was that weak-willed, I'd be pissing all over him in 5 seconds.

    Yay, it is good to be free. My question today is, what the fuck for, though?

  3. It's fascinating to me how we warp God...because that's something I'd say to my kids..."all that I've done for you"...God ought to say that to us, that after all he's done for us that we would dare ask him for anything...but we know he doesn't work that way. Thank God.

    So you ask, what the fuck to be free for? Is that the question?

    So we can live with God and not be either crammed in a size 1 box when we are size 1000 or so we don't commit suicide with the despair of it all. In my opinion.

    And maybe along the way so we can do some good with out selfish little lives.

  4. Don't fall for the temptation of committing suicide to see God early. God'll say, "What the fuck are you doing here? Fuck off until I'm ready." And if He's in a really bad mood, He'll fling you into Hell.

    "I'm already on the floor enough as it is." Well wait until you're not only on the floor, but fucked over so badly while you're floored that you can never get up again. Fucked over by God with the business end of life: "Take that you cunt, there'll be worse when I fling you into Hell".

    God get dissed? He dissed Himself with that shit He wrote in the Bible.

    Dear God,

    You're a cunt. And your mother fucking son, Jesus, is an unemployed bum. Amen.

  5. You are boring me, David.

    Go away and annoy someone else

  6. Annyyyhoww...that Edgar's place looks cool...did you have a nice visit? Do you volunteer there?

  7. Edgar's Mission looks like a thin place -- where both the animals and the people who care for and visit them are healed by one another. Funny how God uses these sweet animals to teach us about his love.
    I met an old priest once who referred to some folks as "intentional Catholics". They weren't the folks standing in line to get their cards punched. They encountered God, met God in the depths of their hearts, and lived from that knowledge. You may not fit the "Catholic" part (I am tempted to say, lucky you!), but your "intentions" seem to be well-focused.

  8. It was a good place, but it was a really hot day so two hours was ample. But yes, I like the thought of it being a thin place - this woman started it up just out of a desire in her own mind, and now she has 150 animals that she is looking after. I didn't volunteer there - it's too far away for me. I want to find something closer to home.

    Did I feel bad that I went home that night and ate chicken? And ate bacon the next day? Yep. It really kinda creeps me out that my taste buds rule so grandly :(

    Thanks Barbara, that is a really lovely thing to say!


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