I Really Do Not Feel That Adrian Gurvitz Ended up Writing a Classic, Do You?

I'm sure he really wanted to write a classic. And yet his motivations seem faintly suspicious to me. They have all the hallmarks of someone who is spilling their creative seed all over the ground because it's easier to talk about their art than to make it. Look at him, babe. He's an addict for your love, blustering and swaggering. You're probably the 11th person he's developed an addiction to since January. He seems obsessional because he's a blocked artist. He's a blocked artist because he insists on writing a classic instead of just writing a goddamn song.

I suspect he has as much creative discipline as a shoelace. You, babe, seem like a pretty switched on gal. God knows, you turned his head, being different from the rest. I wonder if his cheap talk is fooling you?

The whole attic thing is a giveaway. He's playing that game where he states his intention, and then inserts a few subclauses that guarantee he never will achieve it. Not for him the standard pedestrianism of "I would go and write a classic but I can't tear myself away from Bejeweled Blitz." No, he needs to invent an entire attic space. "Dammit, I can feel the classic whirling around inside of me. How unfortunate that I live in a single storey house. May as well go look at porn instead."

He should rethink his idea about sending his classic right away, if he manages to get anything finished. I think he should consider a second draft and a spot of proofreading for grammar. It's only polite. And maybe he should lower his sights, get a bit more playful - try just writing a song, instead of aiming for a classic, maybe? From one perfectionist to another :) If it's anything like this tripe he's already written, he really should aim lower ;)