The person in front of you cannot really see you. Not in the world we live in now they can't. You are an elaborately constructed edifice designed to ...
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| Pic by Vinoth Chandar |
Objects in Mirror are Closer Than They Appear
Wednesday, 29 May 2013
You cannot really see the person in front of you. Not in the world we live in now you can't. They are an elaborately constructed edifice designed to protect them from the harsh realities of life and from nasty people. You can't see the real them. Not until you know them for a million years and then maybe not even then. You would do better trying to feel your way.
The person in front of you cannot really see you. Not in the world we live in now they can't. You are an elaborately constructed edifice designed to ...
The person in front of you cannot really see you. Not in the world we live in now they can't. You are an elaborately constructed edifice designed to ...
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When I read Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison in college I had this realization for the first time, and it freaked me the f*ck out - you mean, people don't see me the way I WANT to be seen???!!!
ReplyDeleteOh, that stuff is surely some of the most painful stuff! We want to be seen, we want to be seen! I was listening to Tara Brach yesterday talking about the in-love phenomenon and how being in love is like returning to the mother where it's just merging and acceptance. And then wham, the chemicals wear off and it's one more person in front of you who you have to stop projecting your shit on instead of projecting your desire for merging on :P
DeleteBut yeah, it's so hard a thing to learn, a real killer. It still freaks me the f*ck out, seriously. I have just uncovered a new fresh layer of victimhood and wow, it's turgid in there with "Notice me! Notice me!" Gotta find it within now, fill up that hole with what's already there. Thanks for that reminder, Tara :)
And thanks for mentioning that book, Susan. I've heard of Ralph Ellison before but this is definitely going on the to-read list.
Yup, yup, yup. If it makes you feel any better, I'm right there with ya.
DeleteInvisible Man is definitely a good read. I had to read it for a class in college called "Cross-Cultural Encounters in American Literature." The whole class kinda freaked me the f*ck out, frankly.
It *does* make me feel better, somehow. That space is also rife with the potential to stab yourself with comparisons and with "I'm a bigger, more pathetic loser than anybody else. NOBODY else deals with this shit" etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc etc.
DeleteAh the demon Comparison, I know her well. The twin sister of Jealousy, both of whom are nursed by Speculation. I actually coined a new word in my journal the other day for that horrible process - Compeculation.
ReplyDeleteSounds like something used in a gynaecological exam :)
DeleteFeeling your way is heaps more interesting than thinking you 'know'. Never-ending adventure :)
ReplyDelete